Cornered by God

What is that one thing that irritates you beyond all limits? I mean really, it gets under your skin and troubles you. You just can’t shake it off. You’ve tried, made decisions, made confessions, and even begged God, but this one thing does not change at all.

Maybe its something regarding your behavior or certain habits that just don’t seem to go away. Or it maybe its that relationship that is so difficult. It could be the job or the career that you’ve selected. You jumped into it years ago for various reasons, but now it seems just meaningless.
You need to identify that one thing. Oh, yes, for some of you, there is no need to try to identify it. It just has a huge place in your daily life that you can’t miss it. It’s just right in your face all the time.
You wonder if God doesn’t care, if he is not at all concerned about your struggles. Sometimes you wonder if God did it! Maybe he is the one who brought you into this mess and caused all this brokenness in your life. You are in this situation because you decided to obey him and to follow his ways.
Ultimately you feel cornered, with no place to turn. You have tried to “change” the people around you, but you realize that its impossible. Then you recognize that the problem lies with you. You are the one who needs to change. But you have come to the realization that you can’t change yourself either. Yes, you realize that you surely are cornered. Maybe cornered by God, but surely cornered by your own brokenness.
This utter helplessness and brokenness you feel is the very reason Jesus died on the cross. Whether this situation was caused by your sin or the result of the actions of others, the cross is the only answer. But then, you may feel that God is the cause for your plight, and you just can’t make sense of the situation you are in. Still, the answer is the cross. Go to him and ask him to help you sort out this entire mess you are in. He will enlighten your mind and soothe your emotions.
So, what is that one thing that disturbs you the most? I don’t believe you can make any sense of the situation by thinking it through. Just go “to the foot of the cross” with all your brokenness. He will place his hands on you. Everything still may not make any sense, but his presence will be enough.
It is difficult to describe the experience of calmness in the midst of the storm. But that is exactly what you will feel. The Holy Spirit will fill you with the realization that God is surely in control of everything in your life that you have no control over.
So, do you still feel cornered by God? Job did too. Listen to his lament: “Yet these thing you hid in your heart; I know that this was your purpose. If I sin, you watch me and do not acquit me of my iniquity. If I am guilty, woe to me! If I am in the right, I cannot lift up my head, for I am filled with disgrace and look on my affliction. And were my head lifted up, you would hunt me down like a lion and work wonders against me. You renew your witnesses against me and increase your vexation towards me; you bring fresh troops against me (Job 10:13-17 ESV).
Do you have a lament to share?
You can express that in the comments here.
Photo by r_stephen  Creative Commons
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2 thoughts on “Cornered by God

  1. Good post, Alexi. One of the deeply set self attributes that I rue is being intensely goal oriented. If something can’t be measured and progress noted, it’s probably not worth doing. “Being there”? Can I track how long I’m with someone being relational or smelling the daisies, I fight against having to do it. My intellect understands that Jesus first called his disciples to “be with him”, but that is not something I have any inclination to do. I also understand discipleship is not about what I want, but what he wants for me. I rue this propensity deeply, but have seen no way to change the hard wiring. Somewhen, I have some hope that the work the Holy Spirit began in me many decades ago, will be completed.

    1. Yes, that struggle is so real. So maybe not just decades, but simply a lifetime is what it takes to transform me into the image and likeness of God’s son. Ultimately, that is his goal in our lives.

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